I confess…
I held my emotions in check pretty well through most of Jenny’s funeral, until all of her classmates, former Girl Scout troop, and young friends, including my son and daughter, followed the casket out of the church. I really wanted to hold it together for my daughter. She’s such a nurturer, and I wanted to focus on her rather than have her try to comfort me. But I am proud that I didn’t lose it at the grave site.
I confess…
I am irritated by a photo one of the girls posted on Facebook. It shows about ten of Jenny’s friends smiling, laughing, playing around, AT THE FREAKIN’ CEMETERY! Obviously, one of the mothers took it. It’s the whole (former) Girl Scout troop, minus my daughter and Jenny. I’m so glad my girl wasn’t part of that. Everyone else left to give the family some private time, except these girls and 4 of their moms. Then they’re taking a picture? I realize there were two girls there that they hadn’t seen in a year, but you know what? I don’t care! I am biting my tongue, or my fingers, trying NOT to comment negatively on the photo and embarrass my daughter. I sure hope someone does, though. A funeral is NOT a social event. They could have gone somewhere afterwards and taken their photo. My daughter thinks I’m over-reacting. Maybe I am.
I confess…
Since Jenny was in her accident, I have had strange dreams. One night, I dreamed about my dead babies (yes, plural - from miscarriages and an ectopic pregnancy). Morbid.
I confess…
I have been irritable for over a week with all that has happened. I’m tired of feeling grumpy and depressed. I haven’t felt like being social, writing, visiting blogs, or having fun, but that is about to change. I need to get happy. Yes, NEED!
And just so you don't go away thinking I can't write about anything else...
I confess...
I used to pick the toppings off my pizza, eat the crust first, then eat the toppings separately. I don't do this anymore, at least not usually, but the toppings are just so good by themselves!
For me it depends on the toppings--I love picking of the really crispy pepperoni and eating it separately. And I always pick off the onions--but don't eat them.
ReplyDeleteI would be angry about the photo. I would say a lot about the level of disrespect it shows for the loss of a child. Feel better soon, many many hugs. xxxx
ReplyDeleteSounds like quite a painful time in your life. I'm so sorry for this loss. And you're right: the behaviour of those girls at the cemetary was completely inappropriate, I don't care how long it had been since they had last seen each other.
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad you posted, I've been thinking about you & your daughter & have wanted to know that you guys were doing ok.
ReplyDeleteThose girls make me sick, I;m sure it took everything out of you not to tell them how inapproapriate that was, well at least it would have me.
I disect my food too...well not quite as much since I have to eat fast because if I don't then my girls will start climbing all over me or something. Drives my hubby nuts when I only have a couple bites of a hamburger left & I take out the meat & eat it seperately. LOL